wapish. whapak. wahoo.

.

cemeteries bear witness to grief (and celebration, in pinas on all saints’ day).

churches see happiness, hope and despair (and boredom, on sundays).

hospitals draw anxiety, relief, panic, fear (and satisfaction from the funeral parlor people).

but the most emotional places in the world are airports.

airports play games with the heart. they house the complete range of emotions, from  fear to regret to anxiety, excitement, nervousness, impatience, restlessness, happiness, confusion, exhaustion, anticipation, sadness, love, and missing… and every imaginable human feeling in between that webster doesn’t have a word for.

and more than that, whatever emotion you expect when you get there… HINDI GANON.

at least i speak for myself.

MY airport scenes are never what i imagine them to be.

.

my first airport scene: romantic turned anti-climactic (but sweet).

i pictured my illinois airport scene to fall straight out of a movie. he’d see me first at the arrival area. i’d look around. then see him. from afar, he’d smile. i’d laugh. we’d walk with a spring in our step, but with tentative strides. he’d hug me. i’d hug back. and he’d say something so mouth-watering or tear-jerking. either or. or both.

but no. i got there first. and during my one-hour pacing, excitement turned into impatience which turned into full-blown annoyance. he texted that traffic was a killer. and i was ready to kill him. after an hour and ten, i saw him first from afar (i’d just gone out of the ladies’ room for the fourth time to put lipgloss on and pat my hair into place–the most you can do after 22 hours in the plane without a shower). then he saw me. i gave him half a smile and in a half-icy, half-teasing tone said "one hour eh." buti na lang my cattiness ended there. because if you rewind to 20 seconds back, the first time i laid eyes on him, he was frantically looking around for me with his hand held up high, gripping a hanger from which a lady’s coat dangled from. on the other hand, was a pair of gloves, a shawl, a hat. obviously the whole getup was for me (kulang na lang mannequin), in case i wasn’t prepared for the cold. that melted the ice in me. buti na lang. kundi namatay ang mga rosas na naghihintay sa passenger seat.

.

my second airport scene: dramatic turned erratic

the e-ticket i’d been holding for a month said my flight home was at 11am. but at 730am, we got word that it was at 9. so i showered and got dressed in record time and we rushed to the airport in silence. just gripping each other’s hands. we got there, and he left the car in the driveway, and we slid into the queue. the time was 8:30. we asked the ticket lady what time my flight was. she said 11. we sighed in relief. we had three hours to kiss and hug and make pa-tweetums and prep ourselves for the goodbye. so i checked my bags in. he was just about to move the car and park properly, when i saw the departure time on the boarding pass. clearly, it said 9. i had 25 minutes. i wanted to get angry at the girl but i stopped myself from screaming cause there were better things to do with my remaining 25 minutes. like hugging and crying. but i couldn’t cry because there were more important things to do. like getting my ass on the plane. there was no time to let a tear fall, just enough time for my eyes to well up. and so my pictured 3-hour telenovela scene was cut short. we hugged. he left. he came back and we hugged again. next thing i know, i was being asked if i liked coffee, tea, or juice.

.

my third airport scene: romantic turned… traffic

i was going to pick him up at naia. i was going to make sure there wasnt going to be a repeat of the illinois tardiness. i wanted the complete salubong cheeze. the lighting up of the eyes, the half-running, the guinness record hugging…

but no. kung traffic sa chicago, mas traffic sa maynila. then the whole arrival area was a palengke, and the airport driveway transformed into edsa (-guadalupe area ha) on a friday. during rush hour. na may aksidente. na tatlo. and when i saw him waving in the crowd at me, i parked. but the guard kept making me move my car. so we shoved his bags in, hugged quick and shoved the other bags in. of course later we more than made up for it.

.

my fourth airport scene: dramatic turned… ecstatic

(mygulay, you’re still reading my nonsense?) i’d been crying for 2 days because he was leaving soon. and on the day itself, during the drive to the airport, i had to bite my lip to keep from bursting into tears. (ako pa. eh pag nasimulan ko, hindi ako megastar kung umiyak, na tipong poised at bumabagsak lang ang luha pero walang nagbabago sa mukha. when my tears fall, all other fluids join in… well maybe not all- ALL ;p) so anyway. eto na, paakyat na ng driveway. (this is it, this is it) he got down. got bags, hugged. and miracle of miracles, i did not cry. i just realized all over again how happy i was. so i was smiling til i drove off.

.

so walang tumama sa mga airport  predictions ko.

.

but my fifth airport scene will be sometime in the near future. and THAT, i know will pan out EXACTLY how i picture it to. all those fluids i was telling you about? they will run in a race against each other.

at hindi lang ako.

he says my next airport scene will be bittersweet.

arundhati roy would say "sicksweet. like old roses on a breeze."

but i say it would be one of the three or four days in my life i will feel all the emotions a human could possibly feel.

except fear.

.

beacause this year, i’m jumping.

taking the nestea plunge.

hindi ako masyado marunong lumangoy pero patalikod ako mag-di-dive.

dahil alam kong maligamgam ang tubig at may sasagip sa akin.

.

This entry was posted on Thursday, May 3rd, 2007 at 1:17 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.